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By: ALMAS, A.C.
“Human maturity and specially affective maturity demand a clear and solid education aimed to a freedom that shows itself as a convinced and cordial obedience to the “truth” of the own self, to the signification of the own existence, meaning the “sincere gift of oneself”, as the path and fundamental content of the authentic personal fulfillment. This is important for the response to vocation and to be faithful to it and to the commitments that it involves, even in difficult times” (HH John Paul II).
Affective and sexual maturity means to reach the maximum development a person can reach regarding emotions and human relations, that is to say, to develop our capacity to love and be loved. But in order to love others, we have to have a right self-esteem, thus it is necessary first:
To accept oneself:
1) Accept your body and the way you are
Accept yourself the way you are; your whole body, maybe you have a scar or a part of your body that is not very attractive to you, but all your body is valuable, every part is beautiful and important.
Accept your character; everything you feel and think is what makes you be who you are.
Accept your illnesses, even when you feel pain and suffering, when you accept them they are more bearable.
Love life and human nature, through them we can see God, imagine how valuable it is if He called Himself “man”.
Accept your intelligence so that resentment and self-compassion do not come to you.
2) Accept your sadness
Think about this: There is an end for everything including pain and sadness. Take your personality, just the way it is, with all its defects and hand it over in God’s hands. The Holy Scripture says: “He (God) knows what kind of mud we are made of”. Tell Him confidently: “I accept my personality and my way of being, because all this is the expression of your will, and I love your holy will because you are my Father and everything you allow is for my own good”.
3) Accept the story of your life
Everything you have lived, even those things you do not want to remember any more have been necessary to be the person you are today, so accept it, learn from it, accept that even in the worst circumstances God has been there for you, remember something: He is the Lord of the stories, and when you accept your personal story, invite him to be the Lord of your story.
4) Accept your family
Nobody has ever had the opportunity to choose his or her family, maybe we can choose who we marry, friends, job, religious community, etc. but we will never be able to choose our father, mother, children, siblings and other relatives, so instead of wanting to change the people around us, why don’t we love them? Why don’t we accept them the way they are?
When you really accept who you are, then it is the moment when you can start your way towards maturity.
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